God Of My Youth by: Sr. Marilyn of the Holy Trinity Facinabao, O.Carm.
“Musmos ka pa lamang minahal na kita…
Aking isasaysay kung mamarapatin.
Sa una mong hakbang nang kita’y akayin…”
(You were still a very little child when I loved you…
I will recount the story if you will allow me,
I was holding you by the hand when you made your first steps…)
I am truly inspired by this song and that is why I chose this as the text for the holy card remembrance of my Profession of Vows. It illustrates exactly the story and experiences of my childhood whence my vocation started. Even as a child I already experienced God leading me by the hand; I already felt “called” even though I did not understand it yet. Our parents inculcated in us, their children, the love for Jesus and Mother Mary. As I grew older, through constant prayers, I understood little by little that those instances and events were manifestations of His call and personal love for me. As far as I could remember, as a child, each time I was asked what I would want to be when I grew up I would always proudly reply with, “I want to be PRIEST!” And do you know why? It was simply because I have never yet encountered a Religious Sister or Nun. I only knew the Priest who used to kiss me and cradle me in his arms when my mother brought me to the catechetical meetings in the church. But the moment I met a Religious of the Assumption Sister, I readily told my mother that I really wanted to be a Sister and not a Priest, after all.
Years passed by and my attention was caught by many other things, until such a time when I could honestly say that I was like a lost sheep. But God is truly the Loving and Merciful One! He patiently waited for my response. He never ceased holding me by the hand that I might belong to His flock and be His. He revealed to me more of His love and even sent me a human instrument for me to see His way, his plan. Time flew so quickly, and now as a newly professed sister, I cling on God’s unfailing grace and immeasurable love. I try not to lose hope and not to be discouraged by whatever trials I encounter along the way. As I have embraced this new chapter of my life, I trustingly strive to be a good Carmelite, not just because my Profession of Vows demands it, but above all to please God Who called me and loved me since my youth. The one thing I will never allow to happen as I journey on is to be separated from Jesus Who is the source of all that I am and the purpose of my life.
My dear Sisters in Carmel, let us continue to pray for one another that we may reach, hand in hand, our Goal, our Jesus – our “shared Lover”!